Nancy Grace

July 23, 2012

I feel like there is no good way to start this post. I used my good spiel about refining my hatred over the years at the beginning of the post about Dane Cook, someone who is far less worthy of such a monologue than the subject of my hatred for today.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you someone who is not only the problem with America, but is possibly one of those helming the entire Shitship as it bulldozes through the 24-hour News Cycle and into every aspect of our lives.

Ladies and gentlemen… Nancy Grace.

Please, hold your applause, or more realistically… fecal projectiles.

Yes, reader, the vile subject of arrow is the one and only Queen Bitch of News Media. The one who openly mocks those on her show and makes them feel like the putrid sludge that she inaccurately claims not to be. The one dismisses others as bad parents but admits to cracking open a couple of beers while watching her infant children.

The one who was so repulsive to an interviewee that the girl actually took her own life afterward.

That’s the one and only Nancy Grace.

My hatred for this sorry excuse for a sack of meat is thick and moldy enough to dip my favorite hot wings into, but instead of containing the creamy, soothing quality of that delicious dip, she burns my ass more than the wings ever could.

She is the saddest sort of media talking head, so sorry that I can’t even use the word “journalist” in a sarcastic way. I wouldn’t dare let the word and her name escape my lips, pen or keyboard in the same sentence.

I have a problem with any person delivering the “news” by making swift judgments of others and interjecting their “valued opinion” into ever sentence, especially one that is of such a finely honed “Christian” variety.

I recall an incident on her show. I don’t remember who was on the show or what they were talking about, but I remember the interviewee fumbled on a few words. It honestly sounded like he was a bit of a stutterer.

Nancy degraded him for his dumb tongue in every way short of yelling “t-t-t-t-TODAY, Junior!”

This is not a woman who should be at the helm of any TV show. Period.

However, she has been knocked down a peg or two.

I recall her infamous “wardrobe malfunction” on the set of whichever show about dancing it was. And the incident on her own show in which one of the switchboard girls, Elizabeth, went rogue and put videos of animals having sex on the screen in the place of Nancy’s face.

A far more appealing sight, honestly. Brings less bile to my gullet.

So, what have we accomplished? Not much. I hate Nancy Grace. End of story.

And honestly, how can’t I hate a woman who caused a preacher to audibly curse in front of me?

True story.



This is not included in the 500 word limit.

Thanks to Lisa Hostuttler for along my member of veiny hatred to again afront your virginal minds.

More and more, she is tricking me into posts I wouldn’t normally want, but they honestly just give me a venue to spout some steam.

It helps, especially since they cancelled The Rocky Horror Picture Show.

Truly ghjr


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