Bill Clinton

February 3, 2012

Oh, Slick Willy. I knew you would live up to your nickname sooner or later.

Of course, I’m going to bring it up.

Here’s the deal:

I was really young when Clinton was president. I mean, I was born at the end of 1988, so I was born under Reagan.

Yes, that is unfortunate.

However, I was only alive for a few months of that, and even then, I was extremely young and didn’t have a finger to the political pulse.

Next up was Bushie Sr., and again, I don’t remember much of what he was doing. I would have been between the ages of 0 and 4, so I really didn’t pay attention to politics. I don’t even think I knew who the president was or that a president even existed when I was 4.

I don’t remember understanding the concept of countries and states until probably right before kindergarten or first grade.

So, basically, I came of age under Billy Boy, and I’ll admit, it wasn’t the worst of times.

The budget was good(ish), taxes were somewhat lower and black people were having a good time, right? Maybe my memory of it is skewed a bit, but my mind was young, and (still) politics weren’t my thing.

The thing that I really remember is the infamous blow job.

Now, keep in mind that I was between 10 and 12 when it happened, so I still didn’t know how all of that worked. I mean, I completely understand it now, and I’d be willing to explain how that all works if you don’t already know, but that’s a different five hundred words.

Plus, if you haven’t been on either business end of one of those and/or you don’t understand how that works, you really shouldn’t be reading this blog. You’re way too young to be seeing some of the naughty language that goes on around here.

Regardless, I knew something about whatever the president had done. It involved a cigar and ruining a girl’s dress. Other than that, no one would fill in the details for me.

And honestly, that was the first time I had heard about being impeached. I kept thinking “in-peached,” which would be like being locked of a giant peach as if it was a prison.

Amazing how the young mind works.

Regardless, Clinton had something about a peach done to him by Congress and something about a ruin, stained dress done to him my an intern.

That was my childhood.

Of course, Bushie 2 came along after wards and really screwed things up for us.

He really didn’t seem to know what he was doing, which was a little more frustrating to me than peaches.

Maybe if that guy got a blow job every once in a while and cleared his mind, he would have been a better president.

No. Probably not.




This is not included in the 500 words.

Thanks to Sam Jones for this one.

It’s unfortunate that I have this limit. I had to cut out a rather lengthy joke about James and the Giant Peach.

It would have been… just peachy.




Truly ghjr



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