The Relationships Between Darth Vader and His Children

December 9, 2011

Sometimes, my analogies are a bit… off. It happens sometimes.

I throw out a weird metaphor, and get a weirder look in return.

I’m used to it.

So… try to follow me on this one, but…

Vader is just a bad father.

Yes, aside from the fact that he is evil, jackass. But, Darth Vader is just a dad that plays favorites, doting on his son that shows plenty of potential and crapping on his daughter, claiming that she’ll never be as talented or promising as the son.

Well, Luke can tap into the Force and has the potential to become a true Jedi master, and Leia is just a princess.

Believe me, when you stack the two side by side, Jedi wins every time.

Think about it, man. Throughout the trilogy, we see Vader and Leia interact just a couple of times. He’s always blowing up her “home planet” and saying things like “You are part of the Rebel Alliance and a TRAITOR! Take her away!” before having her locked in the holding cells of the Death Star.

As for Luke, Vader sets up various traps and schemes to reunite with him and attempt to persuade him to join the Dark Side. To Luke, Vader says things like “Join me, and together we can rule the galaxy as father and son!”

See? He throws his own daughter in a jail cell and give his son employment and the opportunity for advancement in his impending career of evil.

That’s not enough for you?

Well, hang on for this one.

Darth Vader saved Luke’s life.

Remember that one?

Right at the end of Return of the Jedi. Emperor Palpatine is shocking the piss out of Luke, and Vader grabs the Emperor, takes the brunt of the lightning bolts and tosses his ass down what I can only assume to be a bottomless space pit. Wind happens, and Vader falls, sacrificing himself for his beloved son and restoring balance to the Force.

On the other hand, he tries out his brand new planet-raping laser on his daughter’s planet. Now, I know the better part of 3 movies and somewhere around 4 years in Star Wars time pass between the two events.

People change… blah blah blah. Shut up. People don’t change that drastically in that amount of time.

I still don’t know why Vader changed and saved Luke. Perhaps it was some kind of fatherly instinct kicking in. He hadn’t been there for his children their whole lives, so he was going to show everyone that he wasn’t Galaxy’s Worst Dad.

So, he threw a wrinkled, hunched over, hideous old man down a pit and busted up his face mask and breather.

He saved Luke.

And what did he have to say to Leia?

His last words.

“Tell your sister you were right.”

Not “I love her.”

Not “I’m sorry.”

He blew up her planet, and no apology.

He wouldn’t do that to Luke, right?

What? The hand?

You’ve got a point.





This is not included in the 500 word limit.

Thanks to Emily Kersey for that one. I always enjoy a challenge that lets me nerd out for a bit.

However, I know most of you don’t particularly enjoy these ones. Just the nerds.

They are the only ones with the time and dedication to get all the nerd references and such.

Oh, well. I can’t deny what I am, and frankly, I never have.



Truly ghjr


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